Two Poems by Amatullah Hayat

Poem 1: I’m stuck at home with time to spare The world is ending but I don’t care What do I eat or wear?  Should I even brush my hair? I’m losing my mind! I might go break a chair, I could do so much, but creativity is rare  ‘Will I make it through?’ I ask in despair  I’m stuck at home —, it isn’t fair  Poem 2:  What do I do with all this time? I ask myself to no reply. Devoid of choice I try to write, ideas are formed, the ink is dry I look down but feel only strife Anger ensues, I begin to cry I’m perplexed, why doesn’t it feel right? Confined to a room, I look up at the sky I wait for a sign, it takes all night A horizon looms, it was all a lie  I draw the blinds, desperate to hide Confronted with thoughts, I shut my eyes I made it through the day; what a ride.

Amatullah is a first-year student studying Law with Criminology at the University of Manchester. She is from Birmingham but grew up abroad, and enjoys films, reading, writing, and anything that allows her to question her own knowledge.

She wrote the first poem a few weeks after the lockdown began, after the initial excitement of having so much free time wore off. The poem is about the mundanity of those days, and how they blended. The merging days made it harder to have a routine, do simple or creative tasks, and make each day feel different from the last. These feelings of internal struggle caused the frustration visible in her work.

'Poem 2' discusses how lockdown forced people to confront emotions and internal issues, while no longer being able to be distracted. However, those emotions ultimately lead the poet to a feeling of gratitude that the time was beneficiary.